Emotional Independence

emotional independence

We have all heard about being Independent and having enough financial stability to live our lives comfortably. Often, money is prioritised over everything else and we are not able to understand why and how, even after having all the comforts of the world, our life feels hollow and empty.

For many years, we have struggled to grasp the freedom, the essence of life, to find what living is all about and through that struggle we have left the real meaning, the real aim of starting this journey behind. Independence is not only concerned with finances, above all, it is our emotions that require autonomy.

What is Emotional Independence?

Think of a situation, where you have had a conflict with your partner, your friend or a work associate and are unable to manage your emotions while being dependent on them to make you feel better. Would you feel better? The ability to take care of your feelings during stressful situations or otherwise determines how emotionally independent you are.

Emotional independence is generated from within when you work on yourself from the inside out and not the other way around. Life is going to make you feel under pressure, it is going to throw many difficult situations your way, your ability to stay calm, and resilient and navigating through all of it without being crumpled beneath the weight of it all can take you a long way.

How to know if you are Emotionally Dependent?

Here are a series of questions that can help you look deeper into yourself;

  1. Do you often rely on another person to make you feel happy?
  2. Are you unable to take care of your emotions individually?
  3. Does it bother you when your partner or someone close is unable to spend time with you even when you know their work schedules and their inability to find time?
  4. Are you hurt or bothered when someone’s day doesn’t start or end with you?
  5. Do you feel the need to overdo things to make people stay near you?
  6. Are you always looking for ways to blame other people for your unhappiness?
  7. Do you think you are unable to sustain your relationships?
  8. Do you think you have to force other people to prioritise you?
  9. Are you unable to find activities to do by yourself and are always looking for someone to share time with you?
  10. Do you think you are unable to rationally think when situations become difficult?

What can you do to attain Emotional Independence?

Emotional independence is a state that arises from continuous, consistent and careful work every day on self. There is one way of living in comfort and letting things be the way they have always been but the other path, the road not taken, is to work on yourself, to realise the set patterns and to try your best to break them. As humans, we all are beings of emotions and are many times run by them. Therefore, our choices about gaining insight into how we feel and think can have long-term benefits.

  1. Learn about your emotions and understand what triggers them
  2. Take responsibility for your emotional well-being
  3. Understand your relationships and draw assertive boundaries for yourself and yourself
  4. Seek ever-growing language, challenge beliefs of what you should or must do
  5. Gain an understanding of your goals and what you value the most
  6. Learn that your choices can take you long
  7. Seek professional help to develop skills

 

Emotional Independence can transform your life and can help you achieve the peace and happiness you never imagined. It can build your relationships and strengthen your bonds. Remember, you can only help someone when you are safe and in control of yourself. With emotional stability, you’ll be able to aid those around you while simultaneously prioritising yourself.